With all of the excitement in the city of Seymour last week, I’m sure no one heard that Police Chief Bob Paudert made me a reserve patrolman.
Actually, he called me “a reserve to a reserve who never gets to reserve.” I call that a job, so I went and bought this outfit.
Anyway, my top priority in these new duties is to track down this desperado, Samantha Oxenreider, who is wanted on more warrants than I’ll ever be able to count.
I love her sweatshirt, by the way.
If you happen to see her, you had probably better let Bob know, cause he said he’d arrest me if I had a gun.